Today I signed the final bond documents for my house. It was my folks who first encouraged me to buy property. I think they figured that my life was so up in the air with MR BIG BLUE that they just wanted to do what they could to help me settle down. With them being so far away, I guess they worry about me and my future a lot. I am plodding along fine here but having a house will certainly allow me to feel more at home.
When I started the house hunt MR BIG BLUE always came with me to house viewings. I guess it was a bit strange. There I was looking to buy property and move forward in my life while he was still figuring out what to do with his while living at the HK temple. In an ideal world, this would have been something we could have done together. We could have found our dream home and worked on paying off a bond together with both our salaries. But with there being no sign of him even looking for a job, I had to move on when it came to the property front. The longer you wait, the more expensive property comes.
The property search was by no means a simple feat. I had to deal with lots of dodgy people and I had a number of my offers fall through. There really were times when I thought of giving up but people who had been through the process told me that I would just know when I walked into the right property. That moment finally came at the beginning of December. Things were starting to go bad with MR BIG BLUE. He was pulling away from me and I started to feel awkward asking him to come to viewings with me, so instead I took a friend.
Finding my house was a somewhat slightly strange experience. I am quite a straight laced kind of girl so I don’t really believe in mystical signs or the like (that was always more MR BIG BLUE’s forte) so it how I found and secured the place is a little hard for me to explain. It had been a bit of a long morning of viewing various show houses when I walked into the Castle (let’s call it that because its fit for a princess). I automatically LOVED it (as everyone had promised I would when I walked into the place for me). It had high ceilings, a fireplace, a cute garden and a lovely big social kitchen. I could easily picture myself living there. Chilling in the living room, having friends over, cuddling in front of the fireplace with MR BIG BLUE, painting and doing DIY together, having our (future) babies running around in the backyard…OK I am getting ahead of myself. The only problem was that the property price was a bit higher than I had budgeted for.
I spoke to my parents as soon as I saw the place and told them that I LOVED it, but there were two other offers in on the place already so I needed to decide quickly whether I would put in an offer. I then took some time out just to clear my head a little and I walked past a little community fair. Like I said, I am not big on all these hocus pocus signs but MR BIG BLUE had always told me keep an eye out for signs. Anyway, strangely enough as I walked passed the fair I saw the smiling face of Lord Jaganath (an incarnation of Krishna). Strange. I didn’t think too much about it. My parents called me back and encouraged me to put in a solid offer. So I did. There is not much more to tell other than by the time I’d driven from the viewing back home I had a call from the agent to tell me the offer had been accepted. It is crazy how quickly things turn around, hey?
I move in (hopefully) in less than a months’ time. I think it will be a bit of a bitter sweet experience. I am really excited about decorating and finally being able to make a place mine but I always thought this was something MR BIG BLUE and I would do together. I realise I am really lucky to have such an amazing family who have not only support me financially but know me well enough to know what I need in my life, even when I don’t. I don’t deserve them. That’s something that makes me really mad with MR BIG BLUE – he was welcomed into one of the best families in the world and yet he still choose something else to surround himself with people who will likely drop him as soon as things get bad and to jump from one damaged women to the next. Like me, my family loved him unconditionally despite the fact that he wasn’t uber-ambitious or super successful or anything. They saw his kind heart and they saw he made me happy, so they not only accepted him but loved him like their own. (Sorry for the rant.). Anyway, I shouldn’t dwell on this. It is what it is. I need to see my new castle as an opportunity. An opportunity to be more independent, to meet new people, to feel settled and create a place that’s totally fabulous and totally me, a castle that will make Cinders happy.
So folks… What do you think of my story? Do you believe in signs or transcendental arrangements (as MR BIG BLUE would call them)? How would you advise me to move forward and use the castle as an opportunity to make myself happy? Do you think things fell apart between MR BIG BLUE and I at exactly the right time to make it possible for me to find this place?
Looking forward to hearing your thoughts. Please please please don’t be blog lurkers but comment on the post (even if you want to offer me some abuse).
LOVE y’all long times,
Cinders x o x o