Counting My Blessings – Part 1 : Family and Friends

This morning MR BIG BLUE reached his final destination…Mayapur,India. I chatted to him on Skype and WhatsApp while he had his long layover in Doha and we had some nice banter back and forth. It was a bit like old times – best friends laughing at our silly little personal jokes: D I do truly hope he is happy, safe and comfortable in Mayapur. This is what he always wanted and I am proud of him for taking this step. And from my own selfish point of view I am just glad he is away from the Divorcee and all the related drama,

While MR BIG BLUE will be getting all the blessings his heart could desire in the holy land, Cinders over here is going to be counting her very own blessings back at the ranch. Even though I’ve had a tough couple of months, I want to focus on the all the positive things in my life at the moment that I can be thankful about.

Initially when I started this post, I wanted to tell you about all the things I am thankful for in my life right now. However, when I got writing I realised it would be impossible to fit in all in to one post that would hold you attention. So I decided to have a series of posts each focusing on a single positive aspect of my life beyond the MR BIG BLUE drama.

This is something I sent to MR BIG BLUE once…I now realise its actually what my friends and family were doing for me.

1. Friends and Family

My relationship with MR BIG BLUE took over my life to a certain extent. I left my family and friends and moved across the globe to start a life with MR BIG BLUE. It wasn’t intentional at first but inevitably I ended up drifting away from a lot of old friendships. To some extent this was because of the distance but much of it was because I got caught up in my relationship with MR BIG BLUE and I didn’t bother making enough effort with my friends and family.

When it came to family MR BIG BLUE made a huge effort. My folks (and the extended family) truly did love him even though he was from a very different background and culture. But with my friends, it was a different story. Even when we visited my home for a few weeks’ vacation he was reluctant to hang out with them. He’d tell me to go out while he stayed home at watch TV. He even once made me pitch to one of my best friends weddings on my own because he decided he didn’t feel well on the morning of the big day (he later went out singing and dancing with the Hare Krishna’s so he wasn’t all that sick – right?). And again when he started to get more involved in the HK movement, he distanced himself from friends that we’d made together here. It was like I was being made to choose between friendships that I had fought hard to form in a new country and him, my reason for being here in the first place.

Sounds about right … 🙂

Anyway, the fact is that despite the physical and emotional distance caused by me being in this relationship when things went pear shaped it was my friends and family who were there for me. Although none of them know the full story, the fact is they know I am upset and they have been beyond kind. They are helping me to pick up the pieces, without asking too many questions or saying ‘I told you so.’ One of my best friends, in fact my only really good male friend (let’s call him Lothario) is even planning on flying over here to spend some quality time with me. He doesn’t know the extent of what has happened, he just knows that something is wrong and he knows that us spending time together again will cheer me. I am truly thankful for all of my friends and family and the worst thing is they’ll never know how much.

Well that’s all for now folks. But before you go…lets chat a little in the comments below. Do you think I am wrong not to tell my family and friends the whole truth? Have you ever had to rebuild friendships/family relationships that you strained when you were in a relationship? How did you go about doing this? Please provide some insights for me.

Thank you so much for reading and offering me your advice and insights. Some of you have been harsh in your comments and it’s not what I have wanted to hear. However, sometimes the truth hurts as they say and you guys are certainly making me look at things from different angles – so seriously, thank you 🙂

Till I see your beautiful faces bringing up my blog stats again,

Lots of LOVE Cinders 🙂