Its a Small ‘Dating’ World after all – A ‘Funny’ Anecdote

Here is a little story that is going to blow you mind. Well, it blew mine.

So let’s rewind to Thursday night. I met up with Dr Sparkle and Tatyana to do a debrief on my date with JSWIPE 😉 Don’t judge us…it’s what we do. (Maybe I should tell you that JSWIPE also saw our group messages where I had Tatyana asking me whether he was a good kisser and Dr Sparkle shouting at me not to kiss a midget…But he was a good sport about it all, messaging them back and telling them that all objectives had been achieved and they needed to find themselves dates instead of being voyeurs…see why I like him!!).

Anyway, there I was busy giving them all the gory details and telling them how JSWIPE and I had talked about everything from politics and race to bad Tinder dates and Fifty Shades of Grey. When I mentioned Tinder dates both Tatyana and Dr Sparkle started to giggle. I didn’t really know why they got the giggles but I just carried on with my swoonery over JSWIPE.

Maybe we should have all gone on a double date instead?

When I finished my story…Dr Sparkle said he had something to share and Tatyana said she was glad I was sitting down to hear this story. OK, a bit strange but I was all ears. Apparently Dr Sparkle had had his own Tinder date while I was out with JSWIPE (little did I know, he never shares his stories with us). He said it had gone pretty well and that they had also shared a little kiss which could have potentially progressed to more except he put the brakes on (yeah, yeah, Dr Sparkle you are such a special guy). Anyway, they too had discussed past Tinder dates and she had mentioned a very clever guy that she’d been on a date with, but the date had ended terribly with them having an argument.

Dr Sparkle being the clever guy that he is (almost academically on par with JSWIPE) put two and two together and asked his date if her date was JSWIPE. And…. It was!!! What the hell??? What are the chances that Dr Sparkle (a guy I’ve been crushing on) and I go on separate dates with new people who happen to have previously dated each other. I was a little ewww’d out to be honest and a little bit upset that Dr Sparkle hadn’t told us about his date on the pre-brief!

It seems that this dating world is a pretty small place. Its not like we even live in a small town. OK, we don’t live in a huge metropolis like London, New York or Paris but it is a city nonetheless. What are the chances?! OK, so there you have it…my mind blowing small world story. Its pretty damn weird if you ask me.

Now your turn…have you ever had any similar small world moments whilst dating? Do you think its weird that DR Sparkle figured this whole thing out? Do you think the story is even real (although JSWIPE also confirmed he had one date which ended in an argument)? Could Dr Sparkle be playing some game with me (because he really wasn’t keen on me going out with SWIPE in the first place and has told me to totally stop talking to him now…for what reason I don’t really know)? Oh,and does this story show that JSWIPE is a serial dater? Does it really matter anyway? Also, do you think this little anecdote says anything about Dr Sparkle and I having certain types which crossover?

Give me your thoughts.

Lots of Love

Cinders x o x o

P.S If anyone gets what is especially special (super special) about this post I will give you a PRIZE.

The First ‘Post-MR BIG BLUE’ Kiss

Wow. Wow. Wow. Wow. Wow! That’s all I have to say this morning.

Well as you probably guessed from the title of my post, my first date with the Poison Dwarf (it really is an unfair name because he wasn’t really short…just not as tall as the guys I usually go for) went well. Actually let’s call him J-SWIPE from this point onwards, because Poison Dwarf is so not appropriate.

We met for drinks after work. I liked him as soon as we met because he just took charge of the situation, ordered is wine and snacks. He let me choose where we sat. I chose somewhere not to hidden away…I didn’t know what his vibe was. We got chatting…work, politics, serious stuff to start with. It was interesting and the conversation flowed really well. We moved on he asked me about my previous relationships, so yes MR BIG BLUE did make a minor appearance on my first pre-MR BIG BLUE date. But actually it was good, for the first time ever I was able to tell the story as it was – warts and all. I didn’t sugar coat things. I told J-SWIPE that MR BIG BLUE got too carried away with the Hare Krishna movement and he cheated on me. OK, so maybe it was a good thing. I know he is a total random but it felt good to briefly be able to tell the truth to someone. He also told me about his previous Tinder dates, which was interesting.

The bar started to clear out as most people were there for a show that was going on upstairs. Whenever other people started walking into our little section of the bar I spotted J-SWIPE giving them the evil eye. I think he wanted to get me all to himself. Then this magician guy came along and treated us to a little show which was pretty good. So he had both of us trying to be clever and figure out the secret to his tricks. A really quirky first date experience.

A Magical First Date experience?

I think J-SWIPE was itching for the magician to bugger off so we could get our flirt on. And then as soon as he was out the picture, the conversation took a turn towards the slightly more flirtatious side. We’d been bantering on WhatsApp about the controversial 50 Shades of Grey and he asked to check it out on my kindle and from there things got a little more interesting. I saw him reach for the dimmer switch behindOne thing led to another and somehow we ended kissing across the table. It was weird because I was thinking so much about the fact that I hadn’t kissed anyone apart from MR BIG BLUE for over half a decade and there I was just like that. And there were butterflies and sparkles and all that wonderful stuff. Then there were more kisses. Him paying the bill as quickly as possible and then suggesting we drive to the beach.

We ended up driving in separate cars which was really strange because he followed me and I spent the whole time thinking he would get bored of the long drive and ditch me (seems I have no faith in men – thank you MR BIG BLUE ! Jerk!). But J-SWIPE didn’t lose me in traffic. We got to the beach. Kissed a little more. Listened to the sound of the waves. It was pretty nice.

Eeek…I did it! First Post-MR BIG BLUE kiss 🙂

I let him come back to my place for a glass of wine…except I had no wine so we drank Vodka instead. Chatted some more. I was a good girl though and didn’t let things get any further than necessary. He went back home late…I wouldn’t have complained if he’d stayed a little longer for cuddles.  Oh well, next time, if there is even a next time.

I spent much of the night stressing that he would not bother message me ever again…but he did. All is good…we now just keep our fingers crossed for a second date.

OK…So tell me your thoughts? Are you pleased to see me getting out there? Was it wrong that I spoke about MR BIG BLUE or is good sign to show I have finally accepted what happened? It’s a bit of a long time since I dated…was it too much that I let him come back to mine (although he didn’t stay over)? Should I hold back a bit? And put your bets on…do you think I will get asked on a second date?

Lots of Love

A ever-so-slightly smitten Cinders x o x o

First Date Jitters

Just in case people hadn’t heard the news. MR BIG BLUE and I are over. I am strong right now, but I know there will be tougher days but today I am positive and that can’t be such a bad thing.

Part of the reason I am strong today is that I have a date tonight. It’s a guy I met on Tinder. Let’s call him the Poison Dwarf (don’t ask!) but that’s a name given to him by Tatyana and Dr Sparkle (yes, Dr Sparkle is fully aware I am going on a date…he is voiced a few cheeky objections, but if he won’t make a move what is stopping me, right?).

I started chatting to Poison Dwarf at the weekend. Actually, the same day I got the confirmation from the Marigold that things were most definitely over between me and MR BIG BLUE. Anyway, this one seems really cool. He is quite a bit older than me so it’s likely that he has had quite a bit more life experience than me. Good looking but in the George Clooney kind of way. He is really intelligent…well he should be as he is an academic. The banter is amazing. The first guy from internet dating/Tinder that I’ve actually clicked with. He is really intelligent and witty. I like the conversation – its fun.

Only thing is I’m really brave when I am sitting a home on the sofa typing away on my phone. But I don’t think I’ll be the same when I meet him in person. I think I will be super shy and a bit of a bumbling idiot. I mean flirted quite a bit over the phone (we’ve even discussed 50 Shades of Grey – yup, I know!) but I don’t know if it’ll be the same tonight. I can talk the talk but deep down I’m just a good girl…so I really hope he doesn’t think otherwise because of all my smack talk.

First Date Jitters- I know how he feels…

Its not like I haven’t been out on any other dates during the ‘grey area’ period with MR BIG BLUE. Remember the Yogic Banker? But this is the first time, I actually feel free to be myself and let go and if something happens, it happens. In all the other cases, I think even if I had felt attracted to the guys there is no way I would have let anything happened while I thought there was even the slightest chance that I could have a future with MR BIG BLUE. But I think this time its different. If something is going to happen I can well and truly be open to it.

So here I am sitting at my desk totally full of nerves about tonight. But that’s a good thing, right? There is part of me expecting him to message and cancel or not pitch at all. Oh and what if he really is a dwarf, like Tatyana and Dr Sparkle decided last night. Eeek !!

So what do you think about me dating so soon after MR BIG BLUE? Is it OK or do you think it’s a recipe for disaster? Are first date nerves normal?

Send me lots of good vibes please. I need a bit of happiness in my life right now.

Lots of love

Cinders x o x o

Surviving Valentine’s Weekend

Hey strangers 🙂 I hope you haven’t missed me too much over the last few days. I am glad to tell you that I didn’t top myself and I am still alive having survived Valentine’s weekend. I did promise you all that I wouldn’t cry myself to sleep thinking about MR BIG BLUE and I’d find some productive things to do in order to make the weekend of hearts, flowers and all things sickeningly romantic bearable and I am pleased to report I succeeded.

So let’s rewind back to Friday, or Valentine’s Eve, for the more romantically incline among us. Friday involved some after work drinks with Tatyana and Dr.Sparkle (minus CCL who was out at psychiatrist following the previous week’s drama). Drinks were followed by a bit of a comedy show (which we had previously booked) which at least gave us a few laughs and meant than none of the singletons had to be a lone. The night ended with a little bit of drama (well, we wouldn’t have it any other way it seems) as Dr.Sparkle gets ‘lured’ into CCLs car and ends up ditching Tatyana and I (more about the Dr in a future post…I think).

I woke up on Saturday, V-DAY, ready to shoot myself in the head. No MR BIG BLUE. No messages from MR BIG BLUE. No flowers. No cards. No wild declarations of love. Nothing but a 90 minute hot yoga class to start the day off. The majority of the afternoon was spent visiting a underprivileged community with the Hare Krishnas and feeding the little kiddies. I wasn’t in the best of moods when I arrived but being around little kiddies who are too young to even understand that its V-DAY was wonderful. It also served to remind me that my life isn’t all that bad. I might not have MR BIG BLUE, but I do have a roof over my head (in fact, I am lucky enough to be getting my dream princess castle very soon), food (and champagne) in my stomach, friends who might cause drama but also lift my spirit when they need too and the most awesome family in the world, so I really shouldn’t be complaining.

Using the Yogic Banker as My Valentines Therapist …Eeek !

I refused to spend V-DAY evening alone at home with CCL and the kitties so I arranged a date with the Yogic Banker. Let me stress here, that I do not find him attractive in any way, shape or form…but we both agreed it would be good to have company. We went out for dinner and few drinks. I decided not to allow myself to get bored with his conversation and instead use him as my therapist (I am terrible, I know). I literally told him EVERYTHING about the past weeks friendship drama as well as EVERYTHING about MR BIG BLUE. It wasn’t probably the wisest thing to spend V-DAY evening talking about MR BIG BLUE but it felt good and it allowed me to get a lot of my chest…talking to someone random who didn’t have any pre-conceived ideas. All in all it was a good day…I won’t lie. There were some tears at the end of the night. I still miss MR BIG BLUE… but I survived the day in the best way I possibly could. I tried my best. Most of the day I kept him out of my mind and that was an achievement in itself.

Sunday, I got invited out for a picnic and concert with Dr Sparkle (told you I need another post about him didn’t and I) and I decided to drag Valentine’s Weekend on for an extra day and went to catch the 50 Shades of Grey movie (read PERVE FEST) with Tatyana last night (but again I will write a whole post on that at some point soon).

A Sunset Picnic with Dr Sparkle – Who is curious to know more?

Now over to y’all my fluffy bunnies. Tell me all about how you survived Valentines Weekend? Do you think I did well getting through the weekend of commercialized LOVE? Was it wrong that I used the Yogic Banker as a therapist on Valentine’s Day? Is it wrong that I still miss MR BIG BLUE? And are you curious to find out more about Dr.Sparkle?

Please please comment and ask questions. It really would mean the world to me.

Till the next episode of life without MR BIG BLUE,

Love you guys more than cherry pie, tacky cards and giant stuffed toys

Cinders x o o

Valentines Day without MR BIG BLUE

So I conquered my first b’day post-MR BIG BLUE last week thanks to a bunch of good friends who kept my spirits high and partied with me. This was followed by a little high school drama which was a bit of an unnecessary distraction. And now BOOM the dreaded V-day is upon us. And how do I feel about it?

Well….I don’t really know to be honest. MR BIG BLUE and I never really did much for it anyway. We always made it our thing to boycott that nonsense, because we didn’t want a cookie cutter, Hallmark-kinda relationship. Our first Valentines Day, we attempted to find a restaurant but they all had ridiculously expensive Valentine’s Day menus so we ended up eating take-out at home and watching movies. One year, MR BIG BLUE tricked me. I thought I’d successfully managed to avoid the day but when I got home he told me that I needed to run upstairs and see what my feathered friend had done to one of my favourite dresses. When I opened the bedroom door, he decked out the whole room and got me the BIGGEST, most tacky Valentines card ever. We had a good laugh. But I’m not here to reminisce about happy times with MR BIG BLUE now am I ?

Boycotting Valentine’s Day – Mine and MR BIG BLUE’s thing 😉

Onward and Upwards that’s what I say. So the plan tomorrow includes finding my inner calm at a 90 minute yoga class, getting involved in a feeding scheme for homeless children to remind myself how much I have to be thankful for in my life and that I need to stop wallowing in self pity, champagne tasting with Dr Sparkle and Tatyana (shhhh…nobody tell Crazy Cat Lady) and possibly a date with the Yogic Banker (I have no other option guys.) The alternative is sitting in with CCL and the kitties and get absorbed into the last 2 parts of the 50 Shades of Grey Trilogy followed by a bonfire where I burn all my pictures of MR BIG BLUE…Which would you choose?!!!

Oh and MR BIG BLUE…Here is a Valentine’s song for you sweet. In the words of Taylor Swift…

Now over to you my Valentine’s cherubs…

Tell me what you think about Valentine’s Day – Overrated or just another sweet occasion to celebrate LOVE? Do I sound like I am getting cynical and moving away from hopelessly romantic ways? What do you think of my Valentine’s Day plans? A positive move away from MR BIG BLUE? Have you guys got any good tips on how to survive your first V-Day as a singleton? Tell me about your plans (if you are doing something nice, I promise to be happy for you)? What have been your best and worst Valentine’s Day experiences? Come along girls and guys…Remember sharing is caring :).

Lots of LOVE

Cinders x o x o